Two things I’ve learned since we’ve started homeschooling

Three and a half years ago I wasn’t sure exactly how homeschooling would work for my family.  My oldest had completed Kindergarten, and while we thought everything was fine, we saw changes that we didn’t like.  Gone was the strict phonics based reading that she had learned at home the year before Kindergarten, instead she was confused by little pictures and bored with sight word stories that made little sense.  She was stressed with interpersonal issues that a 5 year old shouldn’t have to deal with.  She cried every Thursday as she faced timed Math tests.   She was coming unraveled.  She wanted to excel, but when she did she was placed in a peer group of children she could “mentor.”  Her bright and joyful disposition became shadowed and stressed.  

Our first year of homeschooling was a challenge to say the least.  We had Naomi starting first grade,  4-year-old Rebekah, and 1-year-old Nathaniel.  The transition home was harder than I thought it would be.  But I learned some important lessons since we’ve started not so long ago.

My first big lesson was taught to me by Rebekah.  She loved homeschooling.  I had no intention of starting her until her age fell in line with that of her peers would be attending school.  I figured this would give me time to get a handle on what I was doing.  Rebekah asked me when she was 4 to teach her how to read.  She accused me of wanting her to be dumb when I put her off, and finally I had a moment when it clicked--I realized here was a child who wanted to learn, I should teach her regardless of her age.  There is no age limit to curiosity.  Of course, this natural desire to learn can backfire.  Now four years old himself, spouting off facts that he’s learned by listening in on his sisters’ physics lessons, Nathaniel joyfully experimented with gravity.  No one was injured, nothing important was broken.

My second big lesson came this year.  Naomi is not fond of language arts.  Somehow last year our program did not work for her.  I bemoaned her atrocious spelling and worried about her writing skills. By the middle of spring, I realized that I was failing to teach Naomi in a manner that she could understand.  By the end of the year, I decided to “fail” Naomi in language arts.  In reality, it wasn’t so much a decision; it was an all out failure on my part to teach her adequately.  Up to this point, I never thought about a child who has failed at something, or how the method of learning and the method of teaching can vary so greatly.  The onus falls on me to teach my children in the manner that best serves them.  We don’t despair about failing though, we try something else.  Fortunately, we’ve found an English curriculum that makes sense to Naomi.

If I had known even these two things, which it’s ok to try again, that it’s ok to follow your child’s natural inclinations maybe our homeschooling would have been a little less fraught with anxiety.